Painless Family Finance Discussion

Here are some helpful tips and questions to start talking about money with your spouse.

Set a Date

Communicate to your spouse that this is important to you & why. Ask him/her what date and time would be good to discuss your finances together.

No Surprises

Give him/her a rough outline of topics you want to cover. (Include emotions, account and loan balances, and/or problem areas and possible solutions - don't overwhelm them with a detailed textbook they won't read, but just enough that they can feel prepared & not blind-sided)

Timing

Make sure you are graceful & they are in a mood that will promote some progress. (If it was just flat out a terrible day - the dog got ran over, someone is very ill, etc - reschedule. But if one party is just uncomfortable, consider what can be done to bring comfort)

General Tips

• Be distraction-free (no phones, no tv, occupy children in some way)
• Have a favorite treat ready for your spouse (a bowl of their favorite ice cream or glass of sweet tea - this releases some tension)
• Thank them for showing up. Seriously listen to them & consider everything they bring to the table.
• Allow enough time (rushing causes frustration). You don't have to hit every point at this one appointment.
• Gracefully give & take - think outside of the box for solutions. You both need to be happy with the plan & it can be altered along the way.

Chat It Up

Here are some examples of conversation starters:

• What use of money excites you? (Giving, investing, spending)
• How do you want to use money in the future?
• Is what we are doing now getting us there?
• If not, what can we do differently?
• What are your spending priorities?
• How do the priorities compare to our family values?
• Do we need to ask for help?
• How often should we review our financial status/progress?

Happy discussing peeps!